We all experience them at one time or another. It’s like a wall of fatigue which stands in the way of anything creative allowing self doubt to creep in along with a general can’t be bothered attitude. I know because I’m in the middle of one right now. I want to sit on the sofa in pj’s and stare out of the window, the place which usually gives me so much inspiration, and eat crisps. I haven’t sketched anything for ages or made anything either, I’ve no inclination to go into my basement and do anything yet in a strange way my hands and my brain are itching to do something creative. The question is what?
Over the past few months I’ve spent quite a bit of money on online courses from urban sketching and watercolour to digital painting in the hope it’ll kick-start some crafty cogs into working again, and while I’ve learned a lot I just don’t seem to be happy with anything I’ve done.
I suppose at this time of year I’d be spending much more time outside in the garden dead heading and weeding which keeps me busy but with the intense dryness this year my garden is looking more like scrubland with a few crispy plant stalks sticking out to add emphasis to its sorry state. This is my haven, my inspiration, place of joy. I know it’ll come back next year, hopefully, but right now it’s not helping my mood.
I did have a sort out and got rid of a few things which I didn’t use. This made me feel better for a while. It was quite satisfying to clear out hoarded papers and old neglected stamps. I moved other things around to fill the spaces so I wouldn’t be tempted to just buy more. It’s much less chaotic now helping me to move forward and hopefully I’ve made someone’s day with the bits I’ve taken to the recycling shop.
I’ve asked around and it seems that focussing on something completely different is the key. Where I would normally be gardening, I’ve taken out the crochet again and I think it’s working. It’s giving my hands something creative to do and while I’m concentrating I’m not thinking about anything else. This morning I picked up one of those on-line courses again to finish it off and decided to give it another go.
Happy day – the fog is lifting all be it slowly. Maybe I just need to wait it out.
Jaine xx
